Friday, November 30, 2007

I’ve always hated to ask for what I want. I fear it seems selfish.
But can’t I be grateful for what I have (which I am) and still want more (which I do) without being a greedy brat?

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Thursday, November 29, 2007

I want to be like my best friend’s three-year-old.
She stands in front of the mirror and says, “I’m so pretty.”

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Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Yesterday, I told a friend I had a slight case of ennui. Like a worsening cold, today my ennui was fullblown. Instead of a sniffling nose and cough, the symptoms were melancholy and weepiness.

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Tuesday, November 27, 2007

About a million times a day, I’ll say something, and in response, my husband will say, “Blog it. Let’s go to bed.”
Sometimes, he’ll say something, I’ll laugh, and then he’ll say, “Blog it. Let’s go to bed.”
Yes, we really think we’re that charming. Yes, we know were delusional.

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Monday, November 26, 2007

I’ve gained a new sympathy for the contestants on “The Biggest Loser.”
Tonight, I met with a trainer at the gym. I assumed my free consultation would involve a simple walk through of the equipment.
Not so.
Instead, I was made to do push-ups with a core twist, squats while holding a 32-pound weight, sit-ups while holding a ball above my head, and another exercise that involved stepping onto a large box, raising one knee, doing a bicep curl with 8-pound weights and then pushing the weights above my head before stepping off the box.
The whole experience was deeply humiliating.

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Sunday, November 25, 2007

Sometimes one Thanksgiving isn’t enough. So tonight my family had its second turkey dinner in four days. Insanity? No. Just too many good dishes to fit into one day. And I still haven’t made my favorite candied sweet potatoes.

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I was preparing for friends to come over. On the other side of the country, my best friend was decorating the Christmas tree for her entry hall.
While I wonder when did this happen … all these grown-up happenings, acting adult is starting to feel a lot less like acting.

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Friday, November 23, 2007

I ate stuffing and pie and stuffing and pie as if those were the only two foods in the world.

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Thursday, November 22, 2007

And how could I not be grateful when the ones I love, love me in return.

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Wednesday, November 21, 2007

A friend of mine faces the looming task of making Thanksgiving dinner for her relatives. She bought a back-up turkey in case the first bird doesn’t turn out as planned.

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Tuesday, November 20, 2007

I think I’m developing cell phone elbow, which I imagine is similar to tennis elbow or golfer’s elbow. But cell phone elbow requires virtually no physical activity, except for moving one’s jaw.

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Monday, November 19, 2007

A moment from the weekend I forgot to mention:
Imagine me helping pose a bride and her six bridesmaids for a photo outside the very grand and beautiful Legion of Honor in San Francisco.
Imagine me walking backwards away from the shot to make room for my very talented husband, who will shoot said photo.
Then imagine me tripping over a large light protruding from the grass and falling flat on my ass in front of the entire wedding party.

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Sunday, November 18, 2007

The priest said the chrism oil would stain her soul.
She would be baptized for eternity.

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Saturday, November 17, 2007

I overheard a group of groomsmen discussing the likelihood of Lois Lane being able to carry Superman’s child. They conclude that the Superbaby would be so strong he or she would punch a hole right through Lois Lane’s uterus. The solution, they speculated, would be for Lois Lane to wear a protective layer of Kryptonite until the child was born.

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Friday, November 16, 2007

Today, I heard on the radio about a study that found people who describe themselves as honest or moral tend to have difficulty actually living out said virtue.
I felt vindicated by this information.
Every time someone uses the word “integrity” to describe themselves or their business a warning system goes off inside my head, and I question whether they even know what the word means.

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Thursday, November 15, 2007

The recipe said, “Add rice and cook, whisking frequently without scraping the bottom of the pan.” This is exactly what I did, right up until my kitchen smelled like burnt popcorn.
Once something is burnt there really is no undoing it. Still, I tried to remedy my soymilk rice pudding with an extra shot of vanilla and a few spoonfuls of sugar.

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Wednesday, November 14, 2007

I love people who share from a place of self-awareness. People so observant they understand their own motives and speak the truth from their particular point of view.
Oh, yes. I know. I do a lot of sharing. But I’m not sure it’s a result of self-awareness so much as I like the noise.

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Tuesday, November 13, 2007

There’s a chronic illness in my life: Not Enough Hours In The Day.
My best friend, who suffers terribly from the same affliction, referred to our schedules as cluttered.
We think it’s time to clear the knickknacks of our day and make space for something more.
While knickknacks may have a certain charm, a shelf full of them leaves no room for a real piece of art.

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Monday, November 12, 2007

I must have a high threshold for self-humiliation. Tonight I tried Zumba. Think Dance Party USA meets Dirty Dancing meets Flashdance meets the gym.

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Sunday, November 11, 2007

My sister is incredibly coordinated with an athletic history that includes being a dancer, professional cheerleader and cheerleading coach.
She likes exercise classes with loud, fast music and challenging footwork.
I like the quiet and non-competitive nature of yoga.
But today I decided to join her for a step class.
I spent a good portion of the 60 minutes marching in place while the very energized women around me hopped, stomped, kicked and twirled themselves to thinner thighs.
I finished the class unscathed only to get a bloody lip when my sister accidentally backed into me, knocking the water bottle that was at my mouth sharply against my teeth.
Coordinated as she is, she is also a super klutz, which is where our family resemblance really shines through.

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Saturday, November 10, 2007

Newspaper editors know full well that messing with the comics is a surefire way of getting the phone to ring.
But I’m not sure they realize how seriously some of their readers take this issue.
After reading today’s paper, my dad posted the following memo in my parents’ kitchen:

Family Poll:
The San Jose Mercury News is getting rid of Blondie and Opus on Sundays.
Do we want to keep the subscription of the Mercury News OR shall Daddy make a stink and possibly CANCEL the newspaper?
The outcome of the vote will be announced at the next family dinner and the policy implemented as voted on.
All family members get a vote.

The memo requested that family members (even those of us who don’t live at home) indicate our feelings on the matter by signing under one of two columns: Stink or No Stink.

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I can’t think of a clever way to say this. It’s been a very long week. And I am in desperate need of some beauty sleep.

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Thursday, November 8, 2007

I left for work this morning, drove the distance of a football field, came to a stop and then was hit by the woman in front of me, who decided to reverse without using her rearview mirror.
This has happened to me more than once, always because someone has failed to use the rearview mirror. It’s a very important mirror.

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Wednesday, November 7, 2007

I was really nervous today. The kind of nervous brought on when I fear a huge, irreversible screw up is looming like a tropical storm off the coast.
To trick myself into a semi-state of calmness I thought of irreversible screw-ups from my past, mistakes that I made and survived.

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Tuesday, November 6, 2007

A man on the street stopped to compliment my boots.
He said he was from Las Vegas and there people wear shoes like mine all the time.
I smiled but wondered, “Should I be flattered?”

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Monday, November 5, 2007

My best friend will be having surgery.
When I told my father, he warned me there could be complications.
I was immediately concerned and asked him to explain.
“She’ll wake up hungry for a piece of steak,” he said matter-of-factly. “That particular surgery you can no longer be a vegetarian. That’s the most frequent side effect. Look it up online.”

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Sunday, November 4, 2007

As I waited patiently in the resort lobby for a wedding reception to come to an end, a young man working there approached me.
“So your job doesn’t seem as exciting as I thought it would,” he said with a friendly bluntness.
“What do you think my job is?” I countered, curious.
“You’re a photographer,” he declared.
I laughed, as only the worst photographer in the world would sit cameraless for hours while working.
“I’m a photographer’s assistant,” I corrected, which is true. Although in reality, I’m also the photographer’s wife.

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Saturday, November 3, 2007

Should you be in need of a free bottle of water and some kindness, I highly recommend the Chaminade in Santa Cruz, California.

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Friday, November 2, 2007

I’ve been thinking more and more about mulberry trees. Certainly if they could be uprooted and thrown to the sea, mountains of laundry could be cast cleaned and folded to closets and drawers.

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Thursday, November 1, 2007

I watched a recently widowed woman sing a song of joy during the Mass celebrating our beloved dead. Should I forget, I must try to remember this is what the grace of God looks like.

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